Learn Some Facts About Canadian Orthodontists

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Orthodontists are dentists who help patients whose teeth are misaligned. They do this through the use of trays, retainers or braces.

How to Become an Orthodontist
A person first has to have a dental degree such as the Doctor of Medical Dentistry, or DMD or Doctor of Dental Surgery, or DDS. Different dental schools have different requirements to come an orthodontist. In the University of Western Ontario, the 36 month course requires the student to study biostatistics, physiology, head and neck anatomy and oral pathology, then deliver a thesis of defense. After that, the student gets a Master of Clinical Dentistry. In the University of Alberta’s MSc Whitby orthodontics program, the student must have a DDS degree or its equivalent and have completed at least a year working as a licensed dentist. Then, they must complete such courses as Oral Biology I and II, Growth and Development, Introduction to Applied Statistics and attend orthodontic clinics and seminars.

When a dentist has completed their training and becomes an orthodontist, they may join a board such as the Canadian Association of Orthodontists. An orthodontist practices exclusively in their field.

Orthodontic Devices: Braces
Braces are somewhat more comfortable to wear than they were 40 years ago. The brackets are lighter and smaller, and can be tooth colored, which makes them hard to see. Some patients opt for lingual braces. These are braces that are fitted at the backs of the teeth instead of the front. An orthodontist has to have special training to fit lingual braces, and patients need to take even more care of them than traditional braces.

Braces are customized for each patient. This is especially true of lingual braces, which are designed by a special computer. Most patients need to wear their braces anywhere from six months to three years. After they’re removed, the orthodontist gives the patient a retainer to keep their teeth in alignment. The length of time a person needs to wear a retainer varies from patient to patient.

Invisalign is a system where the patient is fitted with smooth, clear plastic trays that have been custom-made for them. The trays are changed every two weeks or so as the patient’s bite comes into alignment. Invisalign trays are worn 23 hours a day, and the thing that attracts patients to them is that they can take the trays out to eat or brush their teeth. Orthodontists like Invisalign because they make it easier for the patient to take better care of their teeth, are hard to see and are more comfortable than traditional braces. Patients wear Invisalign for about the same amount of time as braces.

Orthodontics is a constantly fascinating and evolving dental specialty. Both dentists and patients work together to correct the patient’s bite and improve their smile.

Goat Milk- The Perfect Solution for Anyone with Milk Allergies and Lactose Intolerance

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There has been an increased intake of goat milk globally than ever before. The milk is healthier and more nutritious when consumed raw and organic than in the goat dairy products such as butter, ice cream, dried milk products, cheese, yogurt, or evaporated milk. Goat milk has 13% more calcium than the cow’s milk. Goats produce 2% of milk in the whole world, which is very hard to acquire the milk in most parts of Canada.

Benefits of Taking Goats Milk

  1. Rich in less allergic proteins- cow milk is renowned for its high protein content (alpha S1-casein), which is allergic to many people. Goat milk, on the other hand, has very few traces of this protein making it ideal for people with milk allergies.
  2. Low cholesterol levels- the cholesterol concentrations in the goat milk are slightly lower than the cows. Anyone watching her fat intake should consider going for the skimmed and the semi-skimmed goat milk.
  3. Lactose intolerance– a lactose intolerant person has a problem with the digestion of milk sugar. Goat milk has 10% less lactose than cow’s milk meaning that it is easier to digest. Some signs of intolerance to lactose may include nausea, bloating, excess intestinal gas, diarrhea, and abdominal cramps.
  4. High calcium levels- cow milk is renowned for its high calcium levels. However, the calcium levels in the goat milk are 13 times greater than the cows. Calcium in the milk helps in building strong teeth and bones as well as prevention of osteoporosis.
  5. Rich in vitamins and minerals- goat milk has very high levels of the vitamins B5 and B. The two vitamins are responsible for the conversion of food to energy and development of a healthy nervous system consecutively. Other minerals found in the goat milk include phosphorous, iodine, potassium, and sodium.
  6. Less concentration of toxins in the goat’s milk- veterinarians do not inject goats with the bovine somatotropin, a growth hormone injected into cows. This means that the goat milk does not have even a small trace of other toxic substances.
  7. A boost of the immune system- the selenium content found in the goat milk plays a vital role in maintaining the immune system at the perfect levels. Therefore, drinking goat milk reduces the susceptibility to diseases such as flu, heart diseases, and high blood pressure among others.

Goat Milk Formula

As much as the milk is easily digestible and less allergic, Goat Milk Formula is not ideal for babies under the age of six months. After six months, the parents can introduce the formula in addition to other supplements such as folic acid and B6, which may lack in the goat milk. Adding small amounts of organic yeast and grated liver would help in solving the nutritional dilemma of using the Goat Milk Formula. To gain more information, Kabrita may be able to provide additional insights with their online resources.

3 Things to Think About Before You Go Back to Work After Having a Baby

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Whether you are expecting your first child or you are at home with your new bundle of job and are planning to head back to work soon, you may want to take a closer look at the impact heading to work will have your life. There are many benefits associated with having a two-income household as well as with continuing on with the development of your career. There is also a child care advantage associated with having your kids immersed in a stimulating and active environment every day. However, there are also some downsides associated with heading back to work that may make the decision harder for you to make. As you weigh your choices, consider these valid points.

The True Cost of Daycare
The introduction of child care expenses to your monthly budget can be shocking and burdensome. In some cases, the annual cost of tuition for infant child care is similar to that of sending an older child off to college. This is particularly true when you factor in all related costs. After all, the monthly tuition is not the only child care fee to consider. Think about costs like field trips, annual supplies fees, application fees, school uniforms and more. Some facilities are far more affordable than others, so it can pay off to shop around.

The Daycare Tax Credit
You may have heard that there is a child care tax credit available to offset some of the costs working parents face when taking their kids to daycare. Unfortunately, this tax credit is not as substantial as most parents would like it to be. Depending on your income bracket and filing status, you may only save a few hundred dollars per year on your tax burden as a result of this credit. This may be the equivalent of not paying for a week or two of infant care at your daycare facility.

Your Work Schedule
The costs and tax credit for child care should carefully be considered against your total job compensation to determine if it is financially worthwhile for you to head back to work. When doing so, also consider the functional aspect of juggling a busy schedule. If you have a very demanding job, you may have to go into work very early and return home after dark each day. You also need to find time to do the grocery shopping, care for the house and take care of other responsibilities. You may consider alternative care solutions, such as having a nanny in the house to help with some of these responsibilities while you work.

The cost of child care typically declines significantly for older children, and your center may even have much lower rates after the child turns one year old. If you find that going back to work is not cost-effective now, consider returning to work at a time when rates are more affordable for you. More resources are available at Wee Watch Licensed Home Child Care if you would like to learn more.

Mommies want every day to be about them

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I just saw something so stupid I had to stop what I was doing and report it. Please forgive me for watching Lifetime channel, but they play repeats of Frasier in the morning and I’m still amused by that show.

This is what I heard this morning:

This Saturday it’s Lifetime’s “Going into Labor” Day event. Celebrate the holiday and all the mother’s out there!

Apparently some bimbo running Lifetime’s ad department actually believes that Labor Day is the same thing as Mother’s Day because it has the word “labor” in it, and this dipshit thinks “labor” can only mean giving birth. Breeder women won’t be happy until everything is about them, will they? It wouldn’t be so bad if they actually accomplished anything, but they don’t. They just overpopulate the planet, drug their kids up on Ritalin and refuse to make their kids behave because it might “stifle their creativity.” *disgusted sigh*

No, Lifetime Channel, Labor Day has nothing to do with squirting out kids. Traditionally it was meant to be a day to celebrate the people who actually had jobs, although now it’s only really used to remind parents when to send their kids back to school.

Mommies are insecure, especially while claiming they aren’t

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I had a run in with a couple of insecure mommies this week. These gals know a childfree friend of mine, but the term “frenemies” seems to apply here. Normally I wouldn’t dredge out all this drama, but it highlights something I’ve been saying for a while now about angry moms who lash out at the childfree.

My friend (we’ll call her Jane) was having a few issues with some people from high school who had found her on Facebook. I don’t know the specifics but apparently feathers were ruffled all around. (This is why you don’t add people from high school that you haven’t seen or heard from in years to your Facebook accounts! If you haven’t seen or heard from them in umpteen years, there is a good reason — they are not worth knowing!! Let this be a lesson to you all!)

Some of these people got upset with Jane over her childfree views and started staking out the childfree sites she’d post on (like this one) for stuff to use against her and throw back in her face. (And remember that, too, next time some mommy tells you how hard and time consuming motherhood is — how hard could it be if they have time to stalk childfree sites in attempts to harass their “friends”?!)

Jane recently wrote a blog post complaining about some of these problems. What I got out of Jane’s post was that these gals had been sending her emails pretending like they still wanted to be friends and still liked her, but were being condescending to her about her life choices and saying a lot of hurtful things to her. To be fair, I might have misunderstood what Jane was writing, but this was my understanding of her post.

In the comments I did what everyone does in their friends’ journals: I posted a sympathetic comment. Of course I didn’t know the whole story, that’s what friends (unlike frenemies) DO — they lend support to their friends based on their friends version of the story! That’s how friendshipworks.

I meant what I said, which was (paraphrased):

People who play those types of games with the implied (or outright) put-downs in them are insecure. They want you to know they feel sorry for you because they’ve become convinced *you* feel sorry for *them* and they can’t stand it.

Obviously I was talking in generalizations because I don’t know the whole story or the people in question, but *in general* my comment stands.

Both these frenemies of Jane’s started foaming at the mouth over ZOMG YOU CALLED US INSECURE and ZOMG YOU DON’T KNOW ME PHEONA!1!! (Angry mommies *always* misspell my name, even when it’s right in front of them, as if proving THEY can’t spell hurts me somehow. *snicker*) After peppering me with put-downs (thus proving Jane’s side of the story was true) they rattled off their measurements, how much time they spend at the gym and their (almost) advanced college degrees to me to PROVE they have nothing to be insecure about. They insisted that they are wonderful, smart, cute and fit so they can’t possibly be insecure!!!1!!1!


Um…. What further proof did I need that they were insecure? They made my case for me.

I never suggested they were awful, stupid, ugly and fat. Unless they think the word “insecure” means “awful, stupid, ugly and fat” in which case, they are, at the very least, stupid. You can be insecure about a lot of things, and it’s not necessarily about your looks or your advanced college degrees (or lack thereof). And for the record, even some of the richest, smartest, prettiest, most successful people in the world are insecure about something. Why do you think there are so many shrinks and plastic surgeons in Hollywood?

These women informed me that of course I’d be infuriated if, as a pet owner, I read that someone else said that all pet owners were “brainless dimwits,” just as they are infuriated that childfree people insist all mothers are “breeders”. These rocket scientists informed me that when we use the word “breeder” we’re really calling them animals.

Interesting theory.

As far as my fury over insults about being a pet owner: I’m a cat owner, and I’ve known people my whole life who have told me, “Did you get rid of your cats yet? Cats are stupid and filthy and I hate them and if you were smart you’d get rid of them.” I have a sister and my husband has a brother who love to insult us about our cats, laugh and tell us about stories they read in the news about cats being harmed, and remind us they’ll never visit us as long as we have cats. Guess what? I’m not furious. In fact, as long as my cats act as relative-repellent, I’m keeping them!!

I’ll bet at least 35% of my regular readers think I’m stupid for having cats, and guess what? I don’t care! You are more than welcome to start a website that says, “Pheona’s stupid because she has cats!” and I would probably laugh my ass off over it! I most certainly would not have to run over to that website and insist I’m NOT stupid and tell you how perfectly wonderful, beautiful, highly educated and rich I am to disprove your theory that I’m stupid. I’m not insecure, I have nothing to prove, and your opinion of me does not change who I am.

I don’t care if you think I’m a 4′ 6″, 700-pound, transvestite Satanist who has so much body hair people mistake me for a Sasquatch or that my face is so ugly it gives small children nightmares and that I’ve got 900 years of bad luck because every mirror I look into breaks. I don’t care if you think I’m a 7th grade drop-out who is incredibly stupid and that I’ve never worked a day in my life because I’m a lazy bum who just milks the welfare system. I don’t care if you think I’m homeless living in a cardboard box behind the food shelter, that I’m a drunken drug addict or that I’m mentally ill and shouldn’t be allowed to vote. I don’t care if you think I’m a convict writing this from behind bars at the maximum security prison. I don’t care if you think I’m a bitter, barren shrew who wanted to adopt but was rejected and now I only write this website because I’m just jealous other people can get pregnant or adopt.

I KNOW what I am. I know the great things about me and I know the shitty things about me. I think I’m more self-aware than most people, and perhaps that’s why I’m notinsecure. NOTHING you can say or think about me makes me any more or less than what I already am.

So if I’m stupid, you saying I’m stupid doesn’t make me MORE stupid. But if I’m not stupid, you saying I’m stupid doesn’t make me any less smart! Get it? I have no need to argue with you about whether or not I’m stupid because… I’m not insecure about your opinion of me.

My saying you’re a breeder or insecure doesn’t make you any more or less of a breeder or an insecure twit than you already are.

Since the two of you (I know you’re reading this, even though you claim you “so over” me (“When were you under me?”)) are supposedly raising kids (I know you have them, I just don’t know if you actually have time for them, what with all this internet drama you create, stroking your own egos, all the time you claim to spend at the gym, in college classes and supposedly working full-time, too), you’d better fucking learn that bolded part above so you can, hopefully, someday teach it to your kids so that when they grow up, they won’t have to play these stupid, childish games.

For the record, going around telling everyone that this and every other site says that ALL women with children are hopeless, moronic breeders doesn’t make it true by a long shot. You can keep saying it, but people smarter than you will actually come here (and other sites) to verify your claims and see you are lying. Oh, and insecure.

Breeders & Holidays

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A few thoughts on the holidays:

Point 1: It really makes me ill at how much money people spend on their kids this time of year. These parents today are so afraid of their kids not liking them that they will spend way more than they can afford to give the kids everything they demand.

Growing up, my parents were not about to spend all that much on us, and we didn’t dare demand high priced items. I was allowed to give my parents a list of about dozen moderately-priced items I was interested in and then they’d by me 4 or 5 of them and I’d be happy and surprised when I opened the presents. I appreciate that I didn’t get everything I demanded because I think in the long run it made me a better person. More importantly, if you get everything you want or demand, and you don’t have to work to earn it, it devalues everything. The quickest way to teach your kids to grow up to be productive citizens is to teach them that if they want the nicer stuff, they have to WORK for it. The reason so many young people today are such slackers is that they were spoiled brats who never learned the value of working for anything. They believe everything should be handed to them and they should only have to make the appearance of working.

Today’s spoiled brats tell their parents, “You WILL get me a PS3 for Christmas, and here’s a list of $50 PS3 games I’d better get with it!” and the parents actually do it! I’m shocked beyond belief that people do this! It makes me glad I don’t have kids because I would have to beat their faces in the first time they told me I’d be spending a few hundred dollars on them for one holiday. Regular guilt has never worked on me, so I’m not sure parental guilt would, either. Of course, my kids would then hate me, seeing as I wouldn’t be the spineless wimp that all their peers’ parents would be!

It’s not just that it offends me personally to spend that much on one person for one holiday (although that’s a big part of it), but I’ll be honest – I love my free time, so I don’t want to work 40 hours a week. To that end, I keep my tastes simple so I can afford to not work 40 hours a week. If I had bratty, demanding kids and if I gave in to their demands, I’d have to work long hours to be able to afford them and their expensive tastes, and you know what would happen next. They’d grow up and go to therapy, blaming all their life problems on me not being home enough to properly raise them, even though the only reason I’d be working long hours would be to buy them all the shit they demanded! God damned ungrateful kids!!

I have a friend with two preteen boys who each demanded iPod Touches for xmas (among other things). These two spoiled brats already have their own cell phones (why do kids not even in high school need cell phones?) and at least one of them lost his last overpriced iPod by “forgetting” it at school and it wasn’t there when he got back. WHY would you give kids who aren’t even very responsible such an expensive toy? (I personally think $200 is too expensive to give to a kid who won’t appreciate it or take care of it, but your mileage may vary.) Worse, these kids would not be satisfied with ONLY the iPod Touch for Christmas… she had to buy them more gifts than that. She was out $400 total just for each kids’ first gift! This might not be bad if she had the income to support that, but she really can’t. Even worse? She got them each the smallest model for the iPod Touch, and one kid told her, “You’d better not have gotten me the cheap-y model. I want the big one!”

I’d have drowned that kid if he was mine.

Point 2: I’m really tired of everyone telling me that “the holidays are for the kids!” One friend told me about how broke she was after buying gifts not for her own kids (she doesn’t have kids) but for her friends’ kids. “Well, I have to buy the kids gifts! The holidays are FOR kids, you know!” No, I didn’t know that. You’re teaching the kids the wrong thing by spoiling them that way, and making them think the world revolves around them! I don’t know if this friend is just crazy or if her friends are so horrible they make her feel like she OWES their kids gifts. I’m not sure which is worse. I just don’t see going broke over OTHER people’s kids!!

I’m not big on the holidays myself. I usually don’t decorate for the holidays because I’m not big on holidays. I don’t have a huge list of people I buy presents for, but I like to get things for my friends. I make a list early and I get my holiday shopping done in November or early December, since most of those gifts have to be mailed off. I also just like to get it all out of the way.

The last couple of weeks when people have asked me the usual holiday questions, I’ve gotten the usual breeder answers.

Someone stupid: “Did you get your shopping done yet?”
Me: “Oh yea, I got mine over Thanksgiving weekend.”
Someone stupid: “Oh, that’s right, you don’t have kids, so you probably have hardly any shopping to do at all! ”

WTF? I don’t have kids, so I must not have anyone to buy for? No, I’m just more organized and I plan ahead, that’s all that means. And because I’m not blowing $500 per kid, I can buy more presents for more people, so I probably have MORE shopping to do than people with kids. Why do breeders always have to have some stupid breeder response to everything?

Someone stupid: “Do you have your Christmas tree up yet?”
Me: “No, I’m probably not doing one this year. It’s too much hassle.”
Someone stupid: “Oh, that’s right, you don’t have kids. It doesn’t mean the same thing if you don’t have kids.”

Seriously? My childfree status has nothing to do with any of it! I HATE that people have to equate everything to having kids or not having kids. If I wanted a tree, kids or no, I’d have one. I (regardless of my reproductive status) just don’t like the hassle. I don’t like the smell. I don’t like having to store a fake tree and ornaments. These are things I probably would dislike even if I HAD kids and I don’t know if I’d put up a tree if we had kids. If they complained, I’d take them to the store and let them look at all the trees there. It’s easier.

I really don’t like Christmas much (hey, I like getting gifts and I even like giving gifts, but if we abolished Christmas tomorrow, I’d be cool with that). I prefer Thanksgiving because the meaning of the holiday is much more important – being thankful vs. being greedy. Maybe if we had holiday trees for Thanksgiving I’d be more willing to decorate. Ha!

Point 3: This isn’t really a holiday thing as a general point, but whatever. At the store today, there was a kid about a year and some change screaming and screaming while its handlers ignored it. This leads me to wonder: if they are able to ignore this noise, this must be something they are used to. If kids scream all the time like that, why do people have them? Honestly, either kids can be controlled, and people who don’t are just plain too lazy to do it, or they can’t, and people actually live with this noise all the time. Which is it? If ti’s the latter, that’s horrifying! If babies and toddler are that noisy all the time, why do people have kids? Why do they have more than one, knowing what they are in for?! If I had to live with something that screamed like that all the time, I’d have left it in a dumpster on day three for sure. Who volunteers to listen to that shit for three or four straight years?! I can only guess there is some form of mental illness that causes people to want children because I can’t see how a sane person would sign up for that shit.

Point 4: I used to love doing things to help the needy this time of year, but about 10 years ago all the fun was taken out of that for me and now I don’t get involved at all unless I personally know the people in need. Half the people who sign up for those handouts aren’t really that bad off – they just don’t want to spend their own money on this stuff if they don’t have to. I recall being asked to donate foods and toys for a military donation drive one year and I did because I wanted to help people out. Shortly after donating to this drive, I found out that the people running the program told anyone of a certain rank or lower with children (because you know, people without kids could never be in need) that if they signed up they’d get some of the donations, no questions asked. Someone I knew signed up, even though he and his wife made very good money together. He laughed about it, saying, “Hell, I can afford to buy stuff, but if they’ll give it to me free, why not take it?” While I can’t entirely fault him for that, I was really disappointed that the military didn’t want to verify these people actually qualified as “in need.” There were actual families in need who didn’t get anything that year while people who were financially well-off were getting freebies just because they could. That soured the whole charitable spirit for me.

In the years since then, I met a gal who is a HUGE scammer – she finds friends, family members and a string of ex-husbands (four so far, she’s looking for victim #5 – it could be you!) to mooch off of while refusing to work, but she’s always got her hand out at Christmas time. Meanwhile, she owns designer handbags and designer dog breeds and all the latest tech gadgets that people with JOBS can’t afford, but because she won’t get a job, she gets on all the “poor people in need” lists to get handouts. Any money she manages to wrangle out of people she spends on herself for her designer lifestyle, while expecting handouts for everything else. She’s the first one down to those holiday giving trees to sign up, and she asks other people to buy her kids PSPs and Laptops!

It bothers me that if I donated to some of those “in need” programs, the stuff might go to someone just like her – professional mooches who aren’t that poor and COULD get jobs, but scamming is more fun. I honestly don’t know how she’s kept it up this long. You’d think eventually she’d run out of people to scam, but she hasn’t so far. Not in the nine years or so I’ve known her. *sigh*

Earlier this season I saw something about “help donate toys to families of deployed soldiers” and I did a double take. While this tactic might work in other communities, most of us living in military communities won’t really fall for that. We know that deployed soldiers are the least broke families in the military because a) they get more pay and benefits while in a deployed location and b) while the soldier is deployed, he (or she) spends less money, meaning he needs less money at the same time as he’s making more. It’s usually an equation for people to make out like bandits… that’s why quite a few soldiers volunteer to go back overseas – they generally make good money doing it. They can also sign up for tax free re-enlistment bonuses over there, getting a 5-figure lump sum tax free and many soldiers take advantage of that. Hell, why not if you can?

So call me a cold-hearted bitch, but someone trying to convince me I need to donate toys to these poor kids whose parents are deployed and have absolutely no money to support them, because if I don’t, the children won’t have a Christmas…. it just rubs me the wrong way. While I know it totally sucks to not to have your soldier home for the holidays (been there, done that), but these families are not broke. Extra toys won’t bring daddy home sooner, and in the service, you learn quickly (or you don’t survive) that Christmas is whenever your soldier is home, not Dec 25.

Along the same lines, I recently saw some notice in the grocery store that if you buy (whatever) product, you would be supporting a program to give pizza to military families in need. Wait, what? Call me crazy, but when I think of hungry families in need, I don’t think, “Pizza! We’ll give them pizza!” Generally I’d think of getting the most food for the money, and I’d probably think of getting them things that are somewhat healthier. Oh, but how dare I suggest that poor kids not get their favorite food, right? Poor kids should have all the luxuries of other kids! Never mind the fact that more families could be helped if cheaper foods were purchased for these needy families. But apparently their attitude is that those of us with money should donate MORE to make up for that, right?! *sigh*

It just seems so ridiculous. This time of year just seems to highlight the ridiculous.

Point 5: Since when is NYE supposed to be a family holiday?! New Year’s is supposed to be for adults and kids are supposed to be in bed by midnight or at least at home watching it on TV. Now I see places (not many yet, but enough) talking about a “family friendly” New Year’s parties and I’m blown away. Talk about diaper-whipped parents that they can’t even take a night for themselves without the kids!

I mention Christmas a fair mount in this post only because most everyone around me is doing Christmas and talking about Christmas. (Don’t even get me started on how much I hate the whole “We must force Christmas on everyone” attitude going around with the “It’s MERRY CHRISTMAS not Happy Holidays” bigoted bullshit, because it’s not a childfree issues so I’ll save that rant for another journal.)

But Happy Holidays to all of you, whatever holiday you celebrate, even if it’s only NYE. Best of luck in 2010!

Go read this childfree blog post while you’re at it. I found it very interesting and you probably will, too.

About Phoena

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I’m a mediocre, 30-something, childfree woman. I’m overopinionated and say a lot of things that offend other people. Sometimes I even say things JUST to offend other people. As long as I’m at it, I might as well have some fun along the way, right?

The only interesting thing about me is that I run a childfree website that a lot of people take way more seriously than I do.

Here’s all you really need to know about me: I’m a pretty laid-back person. I live my life to have fun and have a lot of laughs. I would also like to live in a world where people are polite and considerate of others and take responsibility for themselves, their children and their own actions. That’s all – I’m not asking that much! If you see something I wrote here that you find personally upsetting, it’s probably because I called you out on your irresponsibility and excuse making.

Nowhere on this site do I say I that ALL parents or ALL kids are bad. If someone told you that, they are lying. Before you accuse me of something, find proof that I said it.

About this Site

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Dos and Don’ts about this website and this journal specifically:

Don’t expect this site to be all politically correct. If you are some easily-offended cry-baby who is going to think things I say are too harsh, this isn’t the journal for you. Go hang out on the playground and leave this site to the grown-ups. Thank you!

Don’t take anything I write too seriously. I sure as fuck don’t. At worst, it’s my actual opinion which means exactly jack shit in the grand scheme of things. At best, I’m joking, embellishing and generally being sarcastic because it amuses me. Sometimes I even throw in little barbs (like about “band geeks”) just to tease people, but I’m not really serious. I’m just having some fun. So either way, getting worked up over anything I write makes you look pretty damn silly and I’ll mock you for it.

Do become a fan of Happily Childfree on Facebook if you use Facebook. Not because I’m desperate for fans or anything, but because sometimes I post links or updates there that I don’t post here, just because it’s easier, and I don’t want you to miss out. Also, you’ll be notified of blog updates right in your Facebook feed.

Don’t claim that breeders (or whatever other group you want to defend) is just as persecuted as African Americans or that any insulting word is just as bad as the N-word. This will piss me off. Calling someone out on their BEHAVIOR is not the same as insulting someone based on their skin color and enslaving them for hundreds of years and then lynching them for the next hundred, m’kay? Seriously, don’t be so fucking stupid.

Don’t expect me to post as much new content here as most bloggers do. You’ll be lucky to hear from me once a month. I just don’t seem to have the time, partially due to my incredibly poor time management skills.

Don’t ask me to add some code to let people subscribe to comments. I’ve decided against that for now. I’ve heard that can cause some issues (like AOL addresses bouncing and causing problems). I don’t even get that many comments, anyway, so I don’t think it’s worth it. I’m sure there is a way to subscribe to the RSS comments feed, but I’m not telling. The last thing I need is some angry breeder woman subscribing to every thread and coming to argue with anyone who comments.

Do post a comment if you’d like. I may actually respond to your comment, although I probably won’t — again, poor time management skills.

Do email me if you want a personal reply. My email address is easy to guess. I’ll give you a hint. My name is Phoena (careful of the spelling) and this site is called happilychildfree.com. If you can’t figure it out from that, I give up! I might take a couple of weeks to reply (I usually like to answer a bunch of feedback all at once) so don’t give up on me!

How Do I Get On Your “Blogs I Read” list?

I add people to that list whose blogs I actually read. If you want to recommend a blog to me, I’ll check it out, but if I don’t see it as the kind of blog I’d read regularly, I won’t add it to this list. But if it’s a blog written by a childfree person, even if it’s not about childfree topics, I will contact the owner (if it’s not you) and see if they would like to be added to the list I have here.

How Do I Get Off Your “Blogs I Read” list?

Just email me and say you would prefer not to be on that list. I can imagine not everyone wants traffic from this site!

The Rules

ELSE ****

Here are the rules for everyone. Break the rules, and I may delete your post(s) or worse. I hate censorship and I don’t like deleting comments, but I also hate the journal being clogged up with the following bullshit:

  1. I’m opening up comments again so you don’t have to be a registered user to comment. If you want to reserve your favorite username, though, you should still register. I will leave comments open as long as I’m not getting tons of spam or trolls.
  2. You may reply to older posts, no matter how old they are. I don’t have a problem with that. Enjoy!
  3. If you want to post, you must be over 18 years old, as I don’t want some mommy bitching to me about corrupting her baby. I don’t have a way to verify it, but if I find out you’re under 18, I’ll ban you.
  4. Reply to the rant you are commenting to. This means, don’t reply about mommies making bad friends in the thread about mother’s day. Use some common sense! This is a pet peeve of mine because if you comment about things no one else in that thread is talking about it not only leads the thread astray, but it makes it look like I deleted some comment prior to yours that you were responding to.
  5. Be friendly with each other. You’re allowed to disagree and debate, but don’t stoop to name calling or insults. I don’t want to have to moderate a fight between people who should be grown adults. Clarification of this rule: You can use insulting WORDS (such as: “I hate it when assholes (do whatever)”, but don’t reply to another poster and call them an asshole. Got it? Meanwhile, you can call ME any name you like, just make it good. I need some new descriptive words to describe myself.
  6. Don’t even joke about violence against kids. Even if we all know you’re joking, I’m the one who ends up having to field all the complaints from crybaby mommies telling me my site is evil for organizing plans to kill children. I don’t need that crap.
  7. If you are semi-illiterate and can’t manage to form complete sentences, don’t bother posting here. I have no patience for this teen-lingo crap and it gives me a headache trying to figure out what is being written. If you are so dumb you need an example of what I won’t tolerate, it’s this shit: “hy my naim is Kait I m dum I dint finsh th 3nd graid.” I don’t have time for that bullshit.
  8. Don’t put links in your comment. If you do, the spam zapper might think it’s spam and it won’t get through. If the spam zapper misses it, I’ve been known to have a trigger finger and delete comments with links in them before I realized they weren’t spam. Oops.
  9. In case you missed that last rule, let me be even more specific: DO NOT link to mommy bloggers or mommy message boards. If you do, someone will run and tattle to them, and then they’ll all come back here and claim we’re harassing them and it becomes a whole mess. Mommy bloggers have nothing better to do all day than to have internet flame wars because they don’t have jobs. We really don’t want them spending 18 hours a day trolling our websites, okay?
  10. Don’t expect me to answer all the comments. I have poor time management skills and the people who send me emails are lucky to get answers. I might occasionally answer comments here, but most of the time I don’t get around to it. Sorry!
  11. I do allow parents to post here. Some of them are my friends. I appreciate a parent’s perspective occasionally. Don’t get too pissy at the parents unless they are being assholes.
  12. New Rule (October 2009): This is a personal pet peeve of mine. Since such a large portion of the general public now claims to be autistic or otherwise mentally ill and/or have autistic or mentally ill children, it’s no longer “special”. It’s now NORMAL. So I don’t want to hear it anymore. I don’t care if you or your kid is “special needs” — so is everyone else and their kids, it seems. So make your point without using the excuses and sympathy cards, m’kay? (It’s like the idiots who live in a military town and plaster their cars with “I’m an Iraqi Freedom Veteran” stickers. No shit, so is everyone else in town! You’re not special!!)

Additional rules for parents and wannabreeders:

  1. The above rules apply to you as well.
  2. If you act like a troll, your posts will be deleted. I don’t have time for trolls. Troll posts are pointless posts just to flame, especially if you make repeated posts just to flame, then come back a few hours later and make more pointless posts to flame. If you want to discuss, play nice and we might discuss issues. If you just want to hurl insults, save it for your spouse and/or kids. And don’t act all holier-than-thou about how I’m a bitch daring to delete troll posts — I’ve allowed far more dissenting opinions here than you mommies would on your boards or blogs. You certainly wouldn’t let me join on your boards and flame you, so just be glad that, unlike you, I allow contrary opinions here at all.
  3. Don’t harass my regular readers. They belong here, you don’t.
  4. If you start accusing me of saying stuff I didn’t say on my site, I’ll delete your post(s). Actually READ the site instead of taking the word of your bimbo friends. Yes, I know some teen mommy from Xanga told all three of her friends that my site said that breastfeeding should be illegal and asked them to harass me and tell their friends to harass me. But that Xanga mommy a liar, and you won’t find what she claims I said anywhere on my site. If you and your friends are going to lie about what my site says, I’ll just delete your posts, because there is no point to try and discuss anything with a bunch of idiots who didn’t even read my site.
  5. I don’t encourage parents to post, but if you do, don’t bring up your childed status or your children unless it’s really relevant to your point. Posts like, “As a parent, I think…” are annoying. Just tell us what you think and leave your reproductive status out of it. You are allowed to have opinions whether or not you have children, you know!
  6. For the love of all that is holy, do not identify yourself as a parent in your user name. If you have no identity outside of your kids, you’re the exact kind of person we don’t want posting here. We will mock you. It’s pathetic when even you think your only accomplishment in life is spreading your legs.
  7. Do not use this site as an excuse to neglect your kids. If we want to spend all day hanging out here, what’s the difference? If you spend all day here, you’re a bad parent. Why have kids if you’d rather spend time with the childfree than your kids?

Rules updated: May 18, 2008