MomsRising=Parents Deserve Special Rights!

ELSE ****

A rather reasonable friend of mine, who has kids but I wouldn’t consider a “breeder,” mentioned something about the website “MomsRising” to me recently. I’ve heard mention of it a couple of times before, but never checked it out, for fear it was one of those breederiffic mommy-feel-good websites. But when this reasonable friend mentioned it, I thought I might check it out. Contrary to popular belief, I don’t hate everything parent/kid related, and I actually clicked the link thinking I’d find something to rave about.

That was a mistake. It is a (cheezy and possibly ineffective) political lobbying site for breederiffic parents who want “special” rights, not equal rights.

The first thing you see on the main page says:

Tell your favorite Mom she’s a mother of the year! Your favorite mom deserves national recognition! Get her on the national news, thanked by President Obama, and envied by Angelina Jolie.

Are you kidding me? The first thing they want mommies to see on the site is, “You deserve a national award!” You can’t tell me they don’t have self-esteem issues if the big mommy sites primary reason for existence is to promote that shit. As if our government doesn’t have better things to do than to make some bimbo appease her self-esteem issues.

Also on the front page:

Let’s Get Real Healthcare Reform Now!We can’t afford to miss this opportunity to reform our broken healthcare system.Send a letter to Congress now demanding real healthcare reform for families

See that? Healtcare reform for FAMILIES. Fuck everyone else. Further in you’ll see they wan flexible work arrangements for PARENTS – no one else. Say what you will about childfree, but when we talk about reforms, we talk about making things fair for everyone, while parenting sites talk about making things “fair” for THEMSELVES only. Remind me which group is the selfish one again?

They also want:

Clear and independent universal television rating system that allows for choice in the home.

Wait a god-damned minute! They already have television rating systems that “allow for choice in the home.” Every show comes on with a freakin’ rating! Also, the TVs, the cable boxes, and the DVR boxes ALL have parental controls on them. And remember folks, they do not even have to have TVs in the home, or they can have a TV in a locked room or cabinet to keep the kids away from them. JFC what the hell more do these damn entitlement-minded mommies want? Little brown slaves living in the home to monitor the kids and the TV for them?! How can these morons STILL be complaining about this issue?!!

Safe, educational opportunities for children after the school doors close.

This also drives me crazy, as there are tons of activities for youth – parents just invent 500 excuses why not to use them. Every community I’ve lived in has had multiple forms of youth centers and activities, even the small town I used to live in. There were at least 3 community youth centers I can think of, but half the time they were empty because no one would make use of them. Who’s fault is that? While I can’t speak for every single community, I’d guess that most communities have these activities. The moms just won’t make use of them so they have no right to bitch about it.

And of course they are mooing about “Paycheck Fairness Act” which basically translates to:

I want to get paid as much as everyone else in the workplace, probably more, because I have kids to support. I deserve a paid year off every other year to have a baby and bond with it, and I want additional sick days from my non-parent coworkers since I need more sick days to take time off when my kids are sick, too. When I’m pregnant, I’ll need extra sick days for all my doctors appointments, as well. I want first pick of all vacation time off, because I have to work it around my kids’ school schedule and everyone else can just suck it. Also, I want a flexible work schedule so I can take off whenever it’s convenient for me and my kids. I never want to work late or weekends or holidays (gotta have family time!) – leave that to my childless coworkers – they don’t deserve the good work schedules! In fact, I should be able to work from home while playing with my kids. My family will always come first! AND I want promotions just as quickly as everyone else, even if I’m out of the office 60% more than the rest of them and don’t have nearly the experience since I’ve spent most of my career neglecting work in favor of being a mommy.

I’m SO sick of them complaining about getting paid less than other workers when they do less work. Yea, I know there are exceptions – women who are just as dedicated at work as the rest of us, but those are the ones who are likely making as much as the rest of us do. The ones who have a huge pay gap have probably earned that pay gap by doing half of the work when they are at work, taking more time off than anyone else, and never working overtime shifts – in other words, they deserve a fraction of the pay.

The bottom line is these women believe they deserve a paycheck for breeding and the company should just have extra funds lying around to give them money to stay home for a year while having to pay someone else to do their job. I’m not a fan of pure capitalism, but I have to side with the companies here. Why should they have to pay two people to do a job while one sits at home blogging about baby puke for a year? Or worse, why should the company pay someone to sit at home blogging about diaper blowouts while the rest of her coworkers are shafted having to take up her workload in addition to their own because the company can’t afford to pay two people for that job. And I don’t want to pay higher taxes so mommies can scam the system this way and make the government pay them to sit at home blogging! And then, this mommy thinks after coming back from her year’s vacation she should get the next promotion going around because she “deserves” it. How did she earn the promotion while sitting at home not working?!

(No, they didn’t actually say THAT, but that’s pretty much what they mean!)

Maybe I’d have more respect for mommies (and MomsRising) if they used ANY common sense, had ANY sense of fairness and dropped the entitlement “I want it so I should get it I’m a mom!” bullshit.

I’m not that easily fooled

ELSE ****

I haven’t posted much lately, because I just haven’t had much that pissed me off. But then this afternoon I worked myself into such a lather over this damn article and ended up blowing off my entire to-do list. I started to bitch about this on my fan page, but decided I still had more to say and needed more room in which to say it. Lucky you. Maybe.

I wanted to warn you about bitchmedia’s faux-childfree column that is really a bunch of pro-mommy bullshit. It’s supposedly a “feminist” website, but you know how that goes. It seems that most “feminism” today is not about equal right for women – it’s generally “mommyism” – special rights for mothers. What I saw today quickly suggests bitchmedia fits that description perfectly.

This columnist, who is claiming to be childfree (but call me crazy, I’m not sure I believe her from her tone and treatment of childfree), started up last week with an articleabout how she intends to write a series of articles about childlessness. (That’s right, we’re “childless” according to her.)

She starts out by insisting that she LOOOOOOOOVES babies and kids. She just loves them! And anyone who doesn’t can just go the fuck somewhere else, because no one is allowed to NOT like kids on her watch. Yes, we’re not allowed to discuss the possibility that anyone could dislike babies or children in this “childfree” column/forum – that would be demeaning and offensive to moms everywhere and those comments WILL be deleted.

Then she repeatedly refers to us “childless,” which really ruffles my feathers. She bitches about the word “breeder” being insulting, but doesn’t mind insulting us with the term “childless” as if we are lesser people, inferior and lacking somehow. The word didn’t bother me so much when I was younger, but the older I get, the more that “less” word ticks me off. Who is this woman to refer to me as LESS of anything? If I was unmarried would I be referred to as “manless” by these so-called feminists? Fuck that noise!

Worse, while she insists on referring to me as “LESS” of a person, she whines that those of us without children had better know our place: we can’t say anything at all that would offend mommies. No mean words like breeder or brats or anything more inflammatory than that. We’d better keep our damn traps shut because insulting moms or kids is the same as “kicking puppies” as far as she’s concerned. *eyeroll*

Then she stops, without giving any ground rules to parents. Mommies and wannabees (clearly her target audience) are allowed to say anything rude or inappropriate to us (including the put-down “childless”). She might as well have just written, “SCREW YOU CHILDFREE, THIS COLUMN AIN’T FOR YOU!” because that’s exactly what we’re being told.

If only that were the end of it. But no, there is more.

There is one thing we’re allowed to talk about (besides “we LOOOOOOOOOVE babies and kids!”): the “enormous prams that take up the whole sidewalk”. Oh good, I’m glad we childfree have permission to say ONE thing on a supposedly childfree forum!

Oh, wait! Not so fast! Someone DID comment on the enormous prams (strollers) on the sidewalk. Only to be slapped around by the mommy commenters who have free reign. They told her to shut up and learn the real issues, to stop whining about having to walk around the strollers and that HELLO, the whole world should be set up to make their lives and strollers more easy and if we weren’t so stupid (okay, they didn’t say stupid, but they might as well have) we’d know better! Okay, so we can’t even talk about strollers after being given permission to talk about strollers. Check.

Next up, some gal tried to ask why we can’t mention dislike of children and that there is nothing wrong with having personal preference. The mommies were all over her, screaming AGEISM and going back to the same old argument that anyone who doesn’t like kids is every other kind of ism. (You know what they mean: racism. If you don’t like kids, you’re as bad as a racist. You know, ever since Michael Jackson, these dumb white mommies seem to think that people of color will outgrow their skin color eventually, just like kids grow out of being kids. No bimbos, people of color do NOT grow-out of their race so racism is NOT the same as disliking children (ageism).)

Another childfree commenter complained about covering for parents at work while they are constantly out because of allegedly sick kids, and was quickly jumped upon by mommies lecturing her how she’s obligated to help cover for parents at work, DUH. After all, they don’t like caring for sick children, so we’d better be miserable, too! Okay, so another topic that is off topic on the childfree forum: Can’t complain about parent coworkers.

One childfree person had this intelligent contribution:

I do wish we could have some sort of moratorium on comments from parents trying to rationalize to us why they had kids. It’s great that people choose to have kids but this is not an appropriate place to make sure that you’re seen as “not one of those parents.” It would be completely inappropriate and not tolerated for people who are choosing to not have kids to go in a post about parenting and bray about their choice and why they made it, it should be no different here.

A completely reasonable request, right? I’m not going to go to a “July Babies 2011!” message board and sing the praises of childfree life and why I’m SO much better off than the preggos, so they really shouldn’t waddle on over to our childfree areas and sing the praises of their life choices, either. Fair’s fair? Right. Oh wait, nothing is fair to the childless on bitchmedia.

A woman (mommy) who calls herself the “web editor” insists that no such moratorium will be set because people have a right to have their say. And by “people” she means mommies! Childfree can (and are) censored at whim. Add “no suggestion that mommies stop talking incessantly about their kids on childfree forums” to the list of things childfree can’t talk about.

At this rate, we’re soon to run out of things to talk about you realize. If we can’t fucking talk about ANYTHING, what’s the motherfucking POINT of this damn column? (Clearly, there isn’t one.)

Someone else touched on the overpopulation issue as a reason not to have children, and that was pounced on, too. Waa, waa, waa, that would get into the eugenics of who is “right” and who is “wrong” to have kids and that’s unfair because anyone should be able to irresponsibly reproduce any time they want. Yea. Soooooo, add overpopulation to the things we can’t mention on this… faux-childfree forum.

Okay. Time to give up. The comments are being heavily moderated to make sure the childfree keep in our place, yet the parents are being given free reign to take over, argue with us, basically tell us we’re wrong and chase us out. The only thing we’re allowed to say is, “Squee! I love kids and I love this column!”.

My point being: Please don’t accidentally believe that bitchmedia or Ms. Shoot care one iota about the childfree movement or that this column is childfree-friendly in any way, shape or form. It’s essentially a column for mommies to sound off on all their pet peeves about people who choose not to have kids, and to shoot down or censor anything we say if we dare post there. Save yourselves some trouble and see it for what it is up front. Read it if you want but don’t waste your time taking any of it seriously. It’s a complete fucking joke. Hell, it makes about as much sense as me setting up a second blog on this site to discuss Mommyhood! Yes, let’s trick mommies into coming here thinking I was serious about discussion and then laugh while we all slap them around a bit and delete anything they say that doesn’t kiss our asses. It’ll be fun!!

Eh, never mind.

Wait, one other thing I wanted to mention while I’m on the topic of this idiotic article.

[I will] discuss what it means to be an intentionally childfree woman in Western culture. Why are some famous women (Oprah) relatively unscathed by the media when it comes to childbearing, while other famous women (Jennifer Aniston) can’t shake pregnancy speculation?

She really needs someone to explain this to her? All right, I’ll do it. Oprah is relatively unscathed by Western culture because she’s 1) over 50, 2) not the “right” race, and 3) many people still assume she’s a lesbian. Gee, mystery solved.